The Chinese have a story on this, a story based on three or four thousand years of civilization: Two Chinese coolies were arguing heatedly in the midst of a crowd. A stranger expressed surprise that no blows were being struck. His Chinese friend replied: "The man who strikes first admits that his ideas have given out."
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"If someone approaches you with a gift and you don't accept it, whose is th gift?" asked the samurai. "To who tried to give it" answered one of his disciples.
"The same goes for envy, rage and insults", said the teacher: "When they're not accepted, they continue to be of who brought them with themselves".
Proverb posted in Proverbs